A dad's letter to his son & daughter
Dear Todd and Julie,
It was really difficult for me to ask you to forgive me. I wish I had a second chance at being your Daddy when you were little. Back then, most of my time was used up earning a living, buying food and clothes, or working in the yard. I never had any time for you. I never even tried to make time. That was how I watched your Grandpa with me - so I just did the same.
Every time I was upset or angry, both of you got it all. There were some days when I would be happy, but most of the time I wouldn't even talk to you. I understand now, that I was mad at myself, but I took it out on you.
When your Mom told me to move out, I felt it would be best for all of us if I did, but I sure didn't want to leave. I had no plans, no direction, no place to go. but I was determined to make it so you would be proud of me. And so I would be proud of me. It didn't take very long, sitting in my quiet apartment to realize how very much I missed you. I wanted to tell you how much I loved you. I couldn't say the words, so I spent my money on you.
When our visits were almost over, I would get grouchy. That was because my stomach was in knots. I didn't want you to leave me for another week. Every time you went home, you took an important part of my heart with you.
So after a while, I stopped coming around to see you at all. Once again, I was afraid to share my feelings. It was my fault, not yours. All this time, though, you kept calling me and sending me cards and notes. Todd and Julie, you taught me how to love! No matter what I did, you continued to love me and accept me. I'm sure it wasn't easy sometimes. You must have felt hurt and angry.
Every day that goes by, my heart reaches out and gives you a hug and wishes that we still lived together. Every night that passes, I think of you and whisper, "I Love You."
Please forgive me, I am sorry for those lost years. I'm sorry that you had to grow-up so fast. There is time left - our whole lives. You have taught me so much, and I have learned so much because of the divorce. The most important thing is that I can say, out loud how much I love you and miss you - you are my everything.
Love,
Dad
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